The Forbidden Freshman: A College Sports Romance (Nolan U Hockey Book 1)

It’s one thirty in the morning, and I can’t sleep. Dragging my ass out of bed, I storm down the stairs, frustration coursing through me. Mikayla’s soft words have been ringing in my head since I pushed her out the door.

“I never meant to hurt you.”

Yeah, right. Is that why she strung me along? Played me like a fucking fiddle?

I could have lost the bet because of her.

I had every right to push her out of my room.

So why the fuck do I feel so bad about it?

Yanking the fridge open, I eye the beer cans. It’s a day off tomorrow. I could get rip-roaring drunk right now and it wouldn’t hurt anybody.

Sounds fucking good to me.

I snatch the six-pack out of the fridge and go to pop one open when Liam appears in the doorway. He’s in boxer shorts, his chest bare, his big arms folded as he eyes me up for a second, then glances at the beer can.

“Really?”

I snap it open and guzzle half the can. “Really.” I slump onto the stool, letting out a loud burp before wiping my mouth and dumping the rest of the six-pack on the counter.

“Classy.” He takes a seat opposite me and snickers, but the amusement on his face quickly dies. “I’m sorry, man. It sucks.”

He doesn’t even know what went down and he’s giving me sympathy. I should probably tell him, but it’s fucking humiliating, and I’m not sure if I can get the words out. Even to Liam.

“I know how much you liked her.”

I snort and shake my head, taking another swig of beer.

“You can deny it all you want, but she was different to the rest. The way you looked at her was…” His lips curl into a half smile. “She’s a cool chick.”

“Yep.” I accentuate the p and finish off the can, crumpling it in my fist before chucking it over my shoulder. It clatters on the kitchen floor, and Liam rolls his eyes, standing up to throw it away.

“You don’t have to do that, man. I’ll get it later.”

But he ignores me, placing it in the recycling box with the other empty cans before walking back to me.

I wrestle another can out of the plastic yoke and am poised to open it when Liam’s fingers curl over mine. “You sure you want to do that?”

With a derisive snort, I yank my hand out of his grasp. “Yes. I’m sure.”

He winces and I pause, closing my eyes and not wanting to think about how many times he saw his dad get wasted and then violent.

“I just want a little bit of numb,” I mumble.

“Yeah, I get it.” He sits down with a sigh but then gives me a closed-mouth smile.

“You don’t have to keep me company.”

“I know.” He shrugs and stays put anyway.

I eye him up, popping the can and gulping back a few more mouthfuls.

“Any chance you can work out this thing with Mikayla? Whatever it is?”

My lips curl into a deep frown as I shake my head. “Nah. It’s over. It…” I let out a cynical laugh. “It never even really began, so I don’t know why I’m feeling so fucking sorry for myself.”

He tips his head, his smile sad as he picks at a speck on the counter.

I sigh, figuring he deserves to know why I’m saying this shit. Opening my mouth, I’m about to bag a bunch of sorority bitches when a key in the door stops me. We both pause, listening to the front door creaking open and the shuffle of feet.

“Hello?” Liam calls into the entranceway.

The can of beer is poised halfway to my mouth as I wait for whoever just walked in to show his face. It better not be fucking Jason.

Shit, we need to stop handing out keys to this place.

I tense, my jaw clenching until Baxter appears, his face bunched with confusion as he scratches the back of his head.

“Where’ve you been?” Liam kind of laughs out the words.

Baxter’s not a late-night party man. He’s quiet, studious… a bit of a mystery, if I’m honest, but a damn good goalie.

“I pulled a late one at the library.”

“I didn’t know it was open this late.” Liam frowns.

“It’s not.” He shrugs. “After I was done, I decided to take a walk to clear my head before going back to my car.”

I nod, sharing a quick grin with Liam. Baxter’s hair is now standing on end, his face still puckered with this weird frown.

“You good, man?” I ask him.

“Yeah, I just, uh”—he points at me—“saw your girl.”

I tense. “I don’t have a girl.”

“Oh…” His frown deepens. “Okay, well, the shorty who hangs out here sometimes… She not your girl?”

“Nope.” I shake my head, draining the beer before slapping the empty can down. It topples over then rolls to the floor, pinging its way to the fridge.

Liam lets out a soft snicker, giving me a pained frown as I reach for another beer, then glance at Baxter. “Where’d you see her?”

“At the library.”

I go still, a warning flashing through my brain. “The library? You mean, just now?”

“Yeah. As I was walking to my car, I spotted her. She was carrying this big duffel bag, and she dumped it on the ground, kicked it a couple times, then took a seat next to it.” He scratches his head. “It was kind of weird.”

I shoot off the stool. “Just now? As in, it’s dark as fuck outside and she’s huddled up on the ground by the library?”

Baxter bobs his head. “Weird, right?”

“And you just left her there?” I can’t help shouting the question at him.

His head jerks back like I’ve just offended him. “She’s not my girl.”

“Bax, what the shit?” I’m running up the stairs and snatching the keys off my desk before I can think better of it.

Liam’s blocking my way when I reach the front door, pulling on a jacket and boots. He looks ridiculous with only his boxers on, but I don’t think he cares right now.

“You’ve been drinking.” He holds out his hand, ready to drive me.

“But I’m not drunk,” I argue. “I’ve had two beers.”

“I don’t give a shit.” He snatches the keys out of my hand, and I follow him out the door, swearing under my breath the whole way.

Jumping into the passenger side, I slam the door shut as he starts the engine and reverses out of the driveway.

Thankfully, he doesn’t drive like a grandma, and we’re soon pulling into the library parking lot just as a mustard-yellow van is leaving.

“Fuck,” I whisper, my insides running so cold I think my lungs have stopped working. “Please, no, no, no.”

“What?” Liam frowns at me, punching the brakes as I shoulder the door open. “Ethan, what!”

“It’s the pervert van,” I call over my shoulder, sprinting up the steps and bolting over the grass. The cold seeps into the soles of my bare feet, but I don’t stop running until I reach the edge of the library. Mikayla’s not there, and my heartbeat ratchets up as I spin to shout at Liam. “You check that way.” I point to my right before racing around the left of the building, searching for her.

If those guys took her, I’m gonna hunt them down and kill them. I don’t give a shit what it’ll do to my future. If they’ve touched her, they’re dead.

The thought of her in the back of that van, scared and being forced to do⁠—

Holy fuck, I can’t go there. I squeeze my eyes shut for a second.

The maelstrom in my body is at breaking point, fear and rage firing through me in equal measure as I round the next corner of the building and spot a black huddle along the edge.

It’s deep in shadow, and I would have missed it if I hadn’t been looking so hard.

Relief pulses through me in a wave so thick and strong I nearly keel over.

Taking a second to steady myself, I swallow down the aching in my throat just as Liam runs around the corner. I hold up my hand and he stops, glancing down at the black mound I’m pointing to before nodding and quietly backing away.

She’s safe now. He can go wait in the truck while I…

Shit, I have no idea what to say to her. I’m still pissed at what she did to me, but when I thought she was in trouble, I would have given my life to get to her, save her, make sure she was okay.

I close my eyes, letting the relief at finding her ride through me again before shuffling closer. She’s using her duffel bag as a pillow and is curled into a tiny ball with her back to me.

Crouching down behind her, I gently rest my hand on her shoulder. The second I touch her, she spins with a growl, her face a mask of terror as she goes to punch me.

I grab her fist. “It’s okay. It’s me. I’m not gonna hurt you.”

She blinks, pulling in a shaky breath before slumping back down against her bag. The dim light makes it hard to see her features clearly, but I can sense her relief. I can feel the tension passing between us.

Pain courses through me, overriding the heady relief when she murmurs, “I’m sure you want to, though.”

I shake my head, my voice coming out in a husky whisper. “No matter how pissed I get, I would never do that to you. I would never hit you or hurt you or…” My voice dries up as I relive that kick of ugly black emotion that tore through me when I saw that pervert van drive past my window.

“I know.” Her voice breaks and she sniffs, pressing the back of her hand under her nose before sitting up. “What are you doing here?”

“Baxter saw you. As soon as I heard where you were, I had to come.”

She nods.

“I saw the pervert van, and I thought—” I shake my head, balling my fingers into a fist and clenching my jaw as depraved images run through my mind, torturing me.

She lets out a soft sigh, her little fingers brushing over my knuckles. “They pulled in just after I arrived. Thankfully, they didn’t see me, and I managed to sneak around the building. For a second, I thought you were one of them.”

That look of panic washes over her face again, and I have to touch her. Cupping her cheek, I graze my thumb across her lip, my voice husky and pained when I ask, “What are you doing out here, Mick?”

She tips her head and shrugs. “What do you think?”

She left the house again. Walked out the door because of a fight with the sorority sisters.

Was it a fight about me?

Something stirs in my chest, and I drop my hand from her face, not sure I’m ready to forgive her so quickly. But my mixed emotions are going into battle. The logic that she played me wars with the hope that maybe she hadn’t meant to.

But do I really want to go down that path?

I never wanted romance at college anyway. This is my perfect out.

As I gaze at her face, my insides begin to crumple, and it’s only made worse when she sniffs and lets out this shaky laugh that does nothing to hide her vulnerability.

“At least I’m not camped outside the hockey arena, right?”

I huff out a laugh and stand up, reaching for her hand. “Come on. Let’s go.”

“Where?”

Grabbing her fingers, I haul her to her feet. “You’re not spending the night out here. You’re coming back to my place.”

“But you don’t want me there.” She pulls out of my grasp and backs up against the building.

I let out a heavy sigh and snatch her bag off the ground. “I don’t want you out here, so let’s go.”